A Few Funnies To Start The Weekend.

A few quotes to hopefully bring a smile to your face.

" I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes

 and six months later you have to start all over again. "

Joan Rivers

" I don't exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, 

he would have put diamonds on the floor. "

Joan Rivers

" She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. "

Groucho Marx

" Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse. "

Groucho Marx

" When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say. "

Henny Youngman

" My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle. "

Henny Youngman

" I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives."

Billy Connolly

" Have you ever noticed that anybodt driving slower than you is an idiot,

 and anyone going faster than you is a maniac ? "

George Carlin

" I never drink water; that's the stuff that rusts pipes. "

W.C.Fields

Biggi